Right now I’m sitting on my bed, completely full from eating too many kimchi dumplings. While hoping my body doesn’t betray me for my lack of self control, I can’t help but notice how blissfully happy I am. I really didn’t plan on writing a post like this, to be honest I made a list of things I wanted to write about for a few days. I make lists for everything, they’re one of the little joys I find in life. But I think sometimes it’s good to deviate from that list and write how you’re feeling.
So back to me being blissfully happy. I have a plethora of reasons why. One being that today one of my friends that I met while being in a few musicals, has decided to be who they really are. They came out as transgender and decided to be the real them and shared who they are with myself and mutual friends. I’m just so happy that my friend felt safe and loved while getting to this point. It’s also amazing to know that, that love will continue as they go through their journey. As many know, I’m a feminist and an ally for the LGBT+ community. It’s so nice to see that I’m surrounding myself with people who are loving and accepting and it shows me that we all are taking great steps to be able to freely be who we are meant to be.
Another reason I’m so blissful is because of the wonderful friends that I have. Have you ever just sat on your bed and think “man, I have friends who love me and are so supportive”? Well recently I’ve become more aware. I have a few friends where I currently live and to be honest, I don’t know where I’d be without them. I’m constantly getting stressed about school and wondering if I made the right choice with my degree. But my friends are amazing at reminding me of what I love. My friends Rain, Alex and Misha have been my backbone in this college journey. All the late night rides, the long talks or the complete silence that is absolutely comfortable while we eat has shown me that I’ve made friendships that will last a life time. Not to mention, they all give the best and loving hugs I’ve ever received…well that’s a lie, my mom gives damn good hugs. But seriously, if it wasn’t for Rain picking up the phone (even when she’s at work) just to hear me talk about my guy troubles, or Misha and I having our girls night which involve watching “Goosebumps” and still be too scared that we sleep with the lights on, or Alex, my sweet friend Alex who is there when I need him, especially at 1 A.M. when my plane lands from a trip I took. Or when he will sit in the car with me and let me cry and tell me I’m going to be okay when I’m having a hard time. If it wasn’t for them, I doubt I’d be here writing this post.
But aside from my friends I’ve made in college, the friends I have made in California have also impacted my life in a positive way. I’ve been going to California for Spring Break for almost two years now. My childhood friend Kat (who lives in California) has also been there for me, I mean she’s been there since I was old enough to even remember anything. When I go to California, she has always been so kind to let me stay at her place. Kat and I have really grown in our crazy friendship. We’ve discovered so many things in California that she hasn’t even done (and she lives there) and we’ve eaten such amazing food. But it hasn’t been just adventures, Kat and I have become more open in sharing our up and downs in life. We’ve become big support systems in each others life and I’ve never been more thankful. I know Kat sometimes feels like when I’m there she has to make sure I have a good time, but as long as I’m in Cali with her eating steamed buns in Little Tokyo, I’m doing alright. Also if it wasn’t for Kat, I wouldn’t have met Kevin, Hobbs, Jesse, Katie, Dan and David! Seriously this group of people have been the most kind and supportive bunch of misfits I’ve ever had thrusted into my life. From the day they met me, they’ve told me how much they support my academic dreams, my youtube dreams, and my dreams of living out in California when I graduate. It’s even to the point where Kat and them all plan to help me find a place to live when I’m out there permanently. They’ve become my little family and I’m just at a loss for words. I find myself crying at times because they’ve given me so much love and I still don’t know how I can pay them back. Because of their friendships, I’ve become more of a happy, strong and independent woman. How do you even begin to thank someone for that?
This is why I’m blissfully happy, I’ve made friends near and far who look out and care for me when sometimes I can’t even do that for myself. I’m very thankful and I feel so loved. I hope I can one day make all of my friends feel the way they have made me feel all these years. And I also hope that all of my friends and even strangers continue to find their own happiness in what ever way they can. We all deserve this feeling, one of the greatest life can offer.
So now, here’s a few photos from when I was truly happy.